PYONGYANG [Jan. 8, 2014] – After the surprise success of his rendition of “Happy Birthday,” which he sang recently to North Korean dictator Kim Jong Un, former NBA star Dennis Rodman announced plans this week to release a new album.
Currently topping the charts in Pyongyang, Rodman’s “Happy Birthday” has been one of the most widely-viewed in YouTube history, blasting past records set by comedian Roseanne Barr’s version of the national anthem at a baseball game in 1990.
“Let me set the record straight, not all the cover songs on the album will be dedicated to my friend Kim Jong Un, who is a great guy,” said the flamboyant sunglasses-wearing baller. “They will be dedicated to all the other misunderstood ‘bad boys’ around the world – from Zimbabwe’s Robert Mugabe, to Uganda’s Joseph Kony, to Russia’s Vladimir Putin, and Georgia’s Newt Gingrich.”
“I’ve been a bad boy all my life so this project is especially meaningful to me,” he added. “I know how hard it is when the world chooses not to understand you or your actions.”
The album, a concept CD tentatively titled “Stockholm Syndrome,” will feature classics like “Who Are You?” by The Who, dedicated to Than Shwe of Burma (also known as Myanmar) and “Mr. Sandman,” dedicated to Syrian President Bashar Al-Assad – “because Syria has a lot of sand,” Rodman said.
During a recent interview with Billboard, Rodman said he’ll record vocals at Kim’s home studio before returning to his primary duties as the Olympic basketball coach for the People’s Republic of Korea and part-time ambassador to the free world.
Rodman joked that he may even cover the Destiny’s Child song “Bootylicious” in honor of Italy’s former Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi. “He knows why,” he said, smiling. “Bungalicious.”
The announcement is the latest in a series of public overtures between Rodman and Kim that foreign policy experts call a world-class “bromance.” “It seems weird to everyone but them,” said one source familiar with U.S./North Korean relations. “Rodman appears to be the Pyongyin to Kim’s Pyongyang.”
As part of an extravagant launch party for the new album, North Korea’s 31-year-old dictator – said to be a fan of basketball games – arranged a game of “Horse” between Rodman and himself, except each letter earned will spell out “Supreme Leader of the Democratic People’s Republic of Korea.”